Six Feet Under Rock Bottom

When you're pushed against the wall too hard, will you just merely follow orders?

When you're sure you are at your most comfortable skin, but your loved ones cannot accept it, will you sacrifice your identity to please them?

When you know you need a friend, but even whom you consider so close to you cannot understand your point, will you blame yourself for being so close-minded?

When all you think about is to give them a comfortable life but they're so against the ways how you'll make it happen, will you still push through?

When you know you have potential, but you cannot seem to unleash it, will you just give up and plunge to uncertainy?

When you think you lost someone close to you by a mistake you both did, will you just let it slide and wait for awkwardness to ease and carry on or you will blame yourself for doing such stupid thing?

When there are no more optimism to give and everything you hoped for to be okay starts dwindling down, should you surrender or should you fight against the triple heavy weights on your shoulders?

When you're starting to become a liability to a group so precious to you, should you leave without resiliency or gain momentum again and be better?

When you cannot breathe and you just feel like breaking down in one corner because you have no one to talk to, will you let all of it drown you? 

I have these million questions and situations inside my head right now, and as much as I want to talk about it one by one, I can't seem to pull all my shit together. My soul is six feet under rock bottom and I need something, someone or whatever to pull me up. I may not rant or talk about it as much, but I can't deal with this alone. 

I feel stupid and I hate it.